Construction Trailblazers: Paving The Way to Excellence

[00:00:00] I don't want to say that managing employees is the same as managing toddlers, but I definitely see some considerable overlap in both circumstances. Hey everyone and welcome back to another episode of Construction Trailblazers, paving the way to excellence, your go to podcast for innovation, success, and streamlined excellence in the building industry.

I'm Samantha C. Prestidge, your host and expert in operations and processes. I've seen the transformative effects of adopting smart, efficient processes, and these changes not only boost company revenue, but also restore peace of mind for owners overwhelmed by the daily grind. Today, I want to share with you all the lessons I've learned from parenting that also make a big impact in leading teams.

If you're all about leaving behind the daily firefighting and moving towards a future of freedom and predictable success, then you're in the right place. Discover more about us and catch up on past episodes at ConstructionTrailblazers. com Alright, so [00:01:00] what similarities might there be between parenting toddlers and managing employees?

Let me get something straight right off the bat. I am not looking down on employees at all. The lessons I'm going to share are not to minimize the amazing things that employees bring to the table, and it's not to diminish their competency or their intelligence. I'm always advocating for the respect of your team, realizing that they are your on the ground intelligence, and we need great teams to drive greatness in our business and long term success.

So the lessons I'm going to share are just things I've realized overlap with how I interact with my kids and how I interact with my team and my clients teams. And really, this is because we're all human. Your employees don't stop being people when they walk into the office or when they walk onto your work site, right?

At the end of the day, they're human. At the beginning of the day, in the middle of the day, all day, these are real people that we're dealing with, right? So there are five things I've noticed are very similar between parenting [00:02:00] toddlers and leading teams to success. For context, I have two toddlers. I have two boys, they're four and two years old.

So I am always surrounded by just a little bit of chaos. Uh, they're really in the exploring the world, figuring out where the boundaries are type of phase, right? So, the very first lesson is about communication. Toddlers demand all of the skills that we need to leverage for active listening. They want you to look them in the eye when they are telling you something.

When you aren't looking at them, my toddlers will kind of stop talking and they're like, uh, look at me, right? They also, they want follow ups. They want feedback from what they're saying. They want evidence that you are engaged in conversation. For instance, when I am driving home with my kids, when I pick them up from daycare, usually my four year old is rambling about his day or he's just kind of picking a random story to tell me.

And he has learned that when I'm saying, Mm hmm. Okay, yeah, that I'm not really listening, right? [00:03:00] So sometimes he has, he has asked me, Are you focused on jiving, mommy? Um, and he'll stop his story to see if I am ready to engage with him. And he wants to tell me the story, right? And also when we're home, he will stop telling the story if I'm not looking at him.

Right? Toddlers demand all the elements of active listening and proof that we are engaged in conversation. So your employees, they might not straight up demand it. They might not be very forceful and aggressive and like the, Hey, I need you to look at me when I talk to you. Right? They're probably not going to come out and say that.

Things flow so much smoother. Trust is built, rapport is built. Clarity is given. Their wants to really be on your team and to share things with you and to engage in conversation and that innovation and creativity that is going to come when you are actively listening with them and you're showing those good communication skills.

The next thing is, my toddlers need direction. If I don't give them something to do, they will find [00:04:00] something to do. Now, for all of my parents out there that are like, hey, they need independent play, just throw them outside. Yes, totally agree. Kids need unstructured time, that independent play to just kind of be creative and come up with different things.

Right? At the same time, I have to be prepared that if I have given them that unstructured time, that they are going to find something to do. For my four year old, it is climbing and swinging off trees in the backyard. Right? He's probably going to hurt himself. He fell off and scratched his back the other day.

I I knew that something bad was probably going to happen. I wasn't giving them something to do. I was fine with that. My youngest, my two year old, same thing. He is very into figuring things out. He's kind of my puzzler, so he will get into things that he shouldn't be getting into to figure out how they work, to take them apart, and kind of be curious.

So that kind of unstructured time. Also, Similarly, really great for our employees. We want them to be creative. We want them to problem solve, to come up with different ideas, different approaches for things. We don't want them coming [00:05:00] to us for everything, and we don't need to micromanage and give them every single step of something, right?

At the same time, if we are not giving them direction, they will find their own way of doing something. And that's not always what we want. When we have spent the time to create really good processes, yes, we might want their feedback on like, hey, does this step in the process That makes sense. Like, let's figure that out, but we, for the most part, want them to follow the processes that we have in place, because if they don't, then it's likely that whatever they produce at the end, those outcomes might not meet our expectations.

And then we've got to double back. Now we're wasting time. We've got to retrain on things, right? So we've got to give our team members direction to meet our expectations. The third thing. Toddlers love praise and attention, okay? Have you ever heard a toddler go, Mommy, look! Mommy, look! Right? They want you to see what they're doing.

They want to show off their skills. They like when you give them really positive feedback and reinforcement, right? Even if it's some dumb [00:06:00] little circle that they drew. Like my toddlers, they draw, when they draw pictures of our family, they look like potato people, okay? It looks like a potato. with some stick arms and legs, but giving them positive feedback really helps them get creative and do something else and try something new, right?

So even, same thing with our employees, even the ones that are really quiet, they appreciate some kind of praise, and it's up to us to figure out what that looks like, right? So for instance, my husband does not like being in the spotlight. He can be in the spotlight. He does presentations. He is fine doing public speaking, but for the most part, he does not need or crave public, appreciation, public praise for things, right?

Totally fine, though, receiving that praise behind the scenes or in a one on one conversation with his managers, right? That fuels him. He feels good about that, right? But I think for a lot of managers, they might Take that type of personality and assume that they don't always need positive feedback, right?

So [00:07:00] make sure that even with your quiet employees or the employees that don't crave the spotlight, right? That we can see the humility in them. Make sure that you're still giving them positive attention. You're not just always giving them constructive feedback because it's going to change Again, that trust and rapport that comes with active listening, but it's also going to change the morale that they have, their likelihood to stay on the team, right?

And reduce that turnover, the likelihood that they will get more innovative and want to give something else, want to go above and beyond, right? Positive feedback, praise and attention. Really great for our teams. Okay. Fourth thing. Monkey see, monkey do. My toddlers will do what I do, right? So how I deal with anger, they will replicate that.

If they see us doing, climbing something to get to something up high, I'm five foot one. Sometimes I've got to climb to get something high. I'm not going to wait for my husband to grab it for me, right? But I know that if I climb in a certain way in front of my toddlers that they will try to [00:08:00] repeat what I am doing, right?

So sometimes I have to slow down and make sure I'm doing something in the way that I would want them to do it, right? We got to get a stool to get up here. So same thing with our, our teams, right? We've got to practice what we preach. If you lead your team in a certain way, if you don't show up in a like, if you don't show up in a certain way, Let's say for instance, you want them to problem solve, but they don't see you problem solving, or you, let's say that you are managing another manager or supervisor and you want them to hold their team accountable and follow up with them, but you don't ever hold that manager or supervisor accountable and follow up with them and have those kind of leadership development conversations.

Then how can you expect them to do that for their teens, right? So employees will replicate what they see, even great employees, people that were rock stars coming in. If they see that the culture overall isn't focused in a certain way, they will start to kind of dumb down how they do things, right. And, or they will just leave and find a better place, right?

[00:09:00] Monkey see, monkey do. The fifth and final thing is that success comes from reflection and awareness. Realizing what triggers me with my toddlers, what makes me angry. Sometimes that is evidence of maybe an insecurity I have or something that I haven't dealt with and or something just that I need to get better at, right?

Managing certain anger and managing my anger in certain moments, or just how I am happy, how I talk about myself. If I don't take the time to be aware of how I show up to reflect on how I could have done things better, I'm never going to be better for my toddlers and for my kids. And that is not great for them, right?

That can hinder their progress in life. So same thing with our teams. Our teams will do better when we as leaders take the time to reflect, when we as leaders are aware of our shortcomings, when we can be honest about that, and we can try to improve. And your teams deserve a leader who is continuously improving, [00:10:00] continuously trying to be better, and having that humility to learn.

All right. So. Active listening, giving direction, praise and attention, practicing what we preach, and reflection and awareness. Those are five things I see overlap with how I raise my toddlers and how I might lead a team.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. Are you a parent that also sees some overlap with how you interact with your kids, even if they're grown in high school and not toddlers? And how you might manage your team, even if you're not a parent. Was there something on this list that you think is really important for how you lead teams?

I'd love to hear your story. You can reach out to me on LinkedIn or at hello at constructiontrailblazers. com. Both of those links will be in the show notes for you. Thanks for listening and we'll see you next time.